Missing Calleigh
by New Decade
Summary: Him thinking about her simply wasn't enough and the pain he had was a result of his missing her. He needs her more than he thought.


Basically, since we are all sick of the crap CBS is pulling with these two, I decided to write a love sick Eric (based on that look he gave Cal as she left the locker room in 9.02, I think him missing her is a safe bet.)

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

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He laid on his couch, wearing a tank top and a pair of old track pants as he watched the people on the screen moved. He was barely paying attention to the _Everybody Loves Raymond _rerun, he didn't even know that show had started and that the nightly news had ended. His whole world was a never ending blur in which he would get up, go to work, grab a drink with his colleagues and then return home to get up and repeat the cycle the following day.

The days had simply turned dreary for Eric, every task tedious and all meaning seemed to have evaporated. He put on a good front, but inside was a man who felt he was being dragged over the steaming coals of Hell. He would laugh and joke with the following members of the team, reminding himself that being here with them was better than he was last year; well, better professionally, personally things had hit an all time low.

The days were at least tolerable, with a few minor distractions and having to use dedicate the use his scientific mind to arresting a murderer. The nights on the other hand too prolix for his liking, ironic considering not too long ago he had wished the nights had been longer, but then he had Calleigh and the nights were pleasurable. The nights were their opportunity to block out the rest of the world, their troubles and the fact officer fraternization was prohibited. The rules were aggravating and he would often view them as unfair, but he willing endured it if it meant being able to hold Calleigh and hear that angelic Southern voice whisper "I love you" as the moon rays touched her face.

But now that had all vanished as quickly as it had appeared.

For a few golden minutes it had appeared as though Eric had gained what he had fought for, though it felt more like regaining what he had idiotically lost. He had left everything he loved, his job, his friends and the woman he would have willingly spent the rest of his life with. Blinders had been put on him and he lost sight of what was important, something he regretted very quickly.

Only by the grace of God did Calleigh return, first they tried just having sex, both missing the intimacy between the them, and from there it wasn't a big stretch until they were back together as more than just lovers by night. He had foolishly thought, even though he would have to gradually earn her trust back, that he and Calleigh had a bond strong enough that not even his mistake with lying to her could destroy it. Once he returned to CSI he had been certain that his life was on the fast track to returning to normal after a roller coaster of a year.

He was once again employed at the job he had spent a decade of his life and the woman he loved more than life itself; everything seemed perfect, that was until it was pulled from him and his life became turmoil all over again.

The stresses of the job, the fact that many of the lab techs that didn't know him were still giving him glares of hatred for spying on them and Memmo escaping from prison would have been easier to cope with had Calleigh been with him. She was always good at making him feel himself again after the worst of times, she seemed to make the entire world appear bright and beautiful, even though he knew she was the one making his world feel that way simply because she existed. But she was now gone, miles from his arms, and the sun had seemed to set.

Nights like tonight were the ones he missed her so much it was physical, every joint in his body seemed to ache and his heart felt as though it were pumping venom throughout his body. He had thought sleep would creep upon him to dull the pain, only for it to be approaching midnight and him yet to even feel tired. He had considered grabbing a few beers from his refrigerator and drinking himself into an alcohol induced slumber, but he had done that once before because of his yearn for Calleigh and he knew the result would be remaining pain and a headache the following morning.

Although, he wasn't exactly helping himself either, he had constantly been picking up his phone and opening up to his favorite picture of Calleigh; he probably would have saved it as his wallpaper had there not been the chance of anyone at work seeing it.

She had been leaning against the counter in her kitchen, the morning after they had shared their "traditional American dinner." She was smiling the gorgeous smile he loved as much as everything else about her. She stood there in the shirt she had willing removed from him the night before, hugging the fabric close to her body.

Back then, Eric had been certain that first night was going to be a foreshadowing of how every evening for the rest of his life was going to be. He had often thought during those nights about taking her in his arms, looking into her emerald eyes and asking her to marry him. There were moments that the words were so close from escaping that he would have to kiss Calleigh to preoccupy his lips and stop him from proposing. Eric understood Calleigh enough to know that she had a tendency to be conventional about certain things, including marriage, and he knew that they would have to be together a bit longer before any ring would be placed on her finger. Eric didn't mind, knowing seeing her in a wedding dress as she walked down the aisle would be worth the wait.

Unfortunately, he was now convinced that that image would remain nothing more than a vision in his head, or worse, he would see her in a wedding dress, but she would be meeting some other man at the alter; the thought made Eric cringe.

The only thing he could do now was ponder if things would have turned out differently had he asked her to marry him when he wanted. Maybe their problems could have been worked out differently, maybe they could have fought harder to keep their romance alive instead of letting it fizzle away due to poor circumstances. Maybe he would have been holding Calleigh in his arms instead of holding her in his memory.

He had been obsessing over her for hours and the urge to see her was getting stronger, he would have been grateful to just look at her or to just hear her voice for a few precious moments.

The thought made his brain switch from rational thinking to autopilot, he wasn't even conscious of the fact he was picking up his cell phone to dial her home number. He knew it wouldn't be as likely for her to answer that one as opposed to her cell.

Eric wasn't intending on having a conversation with Calleigh, her voice on her answering machine would be enough to get him through the night until the following workday. He thought she would ignore her house phone ringing, her state of thinking was that people from work would be the only ones who'd call her this time of night and they would try to contact her via cell phone.

He pressed the call button and put the phone to his ear, his other hand reaching over for the remote to slightly turn down the volume of the television, softening a sarcastic comment Ray was making on the show.

He listened with great attention to the ringing on the other line, waiting with bated breath for her voice to come in the line. He was expecting her machine come on the line and her say, "Hey, you've reached Calleigh. I can't come to the phone, so please leave a message and I'll call you back." Instead, on the third ring, he heard her voice come on the line, but it wasn't the cheerful voice from the machine.

"Hello?" Calleigh asked, her voice groggy and full of sleep. Eric's heart skipped a beat at the sound of her voice; his desire had been fulfilled. He had been so absorbed in her saying the two syllable greeting that he wasn't thinking clearly enough to say as a reply.

"Hello?" she repeated, a bit frustrated.

Eric's mind did another flip from autopilot and returned to rational, quickly searching the contents of his brain for something to say; better yet, an excuse for why he was calling.

But before he had the chance to even say "Hey, it's Eric", she let out an annoyed sigh, mumbling something about prank callers before the line went dead.

He clenched his teeth and lowered the phone from his ear, completely disheartened. He had heard Calleigh's voice and could have potentially had a real conversation with her. Albeit she would have been irked that he was calling her so late, but at least she would have said something that didn't involve something she found in Firearms, a case or her saying how she "love's him like family."

"Nice going," Ray said from the television, almost as though he was mocking Eric.

"Shut up," he mumbled, picking up the remote to switch off the TV before groaning at himself; he was threatening an appliance.

Finally drawing the conclusion that this living room had tortured him enough for one night, Eric got off of the couch and headed towards his bedroom, hoping his misery would drag him into subconscious.

He placed his phone on the bedside table before getting under the sheets and folding his hands behind his head as he stared at the ceiling. He closed his eyes, praying for daylight to quickly arrive; the quicker the sun rose, the sooner he would be able to get to work and see Calleigh, it amazed him how strong this _want _to see her had developed into a fierce _need _to see her.

Calling her had been a mistake, for reasons more than the obvious, hearing her say "hello" twice didn't heal anything, instead it cut him deeper and now he was left with another bruise on his terribly beaten heart.

Thankfully, the anguish was enough to finally tire him. But, thinking he couldn't hurt anymore than he already was, Eric picked up his phone and once again scrolled to the picture with Calleigh in his shirt.

"Sorry I woke you," he whispered, apologetically. He laid the phone back on the bedside table and closed his eyes, sleep finally finding him.

But the sleep didn't numb the pain like he hoped, for his dreams were haunted by an angel, his angel…his Calleigh.


End file.
